Saturday, June 30, 2012

Big Morning!

Well the alarm was set for 3.50am this morning! I dragged myself up, fed Levi and was out the door by 4.10am. I met Erin at the bottom of Castle Hill and we were off! It was very dark and we were the first ones heading up. Definitely made it up in my best time of 28 minutes and we jogged down for a total time of 52 minutes! Rapt with that! 

We left the hill to go to the week 4 milestone challenge with the Townsville 12wbt Crew. Beach Bootcamp! It was so much fun! Digging, hauling sandbags, shuttle runs and sand castle building. It was great to work out with a fabulous bunch of people, all there for the same reasons.



Monday, June 25, 2012

New PB!

It was a beautiful, overcast and cool afternoon yesterday, so what better time than to go for a run. I had another crack at the Dianella/Goat Track up Castle Hill yesterday, as my 1 month goal is to complete this in under 50 minutes. My time last Saturday was 58:15. Yesterday was 54:40!!! Around 3.5 minutes off. I'm not sure where exactly I picked up that time, I think my general run speed was faster and I really pushed the last 1km. Feeling a bit sore today! 

I'm still struggling a fair bit with food but happy with my exercise regime and am maintaining steadily at 69kg which I'm very happy with. 


Nothing quite like a sweaty beetroot face to show for your hard work! Now to hit the swimming hard this week! Off to buy some swimmers today!

Friday, June 22, 2012

Binge, Binge, Binge

Ok. Time to be frank. I am NOT in a good headspace. This week has just been an absolute trainwreck. Yes, I've had some wins. I'm physically feeling strong, I can see amazing changes in my fitness and muscle tone. And I love it. On the other side of the coin is just this constant eating. I've been starting out the day great - healthy breakfast, lunch and morning snack but after than it's gone downhill quickly. Yesterday I managed to consume almost double my calorie intake for the day, ended with an overconsumption of 1400 calories.

So my question is, why now? Why after 6 months of the disciple of early morning training and healthy eating am I turning back to this addiction to food? I feel like I have no control. I feel ashamed and like I'm letting myself and others down. When I look at my before and after shots I'm amazing by what I have achieved and I love how much healthier I feel. I love when people say how good I look. I love when my husband compliments me and says how beautiful I am. I love that my kids giggle cos my clothes are too big. I love being able to bring loads of groceries up the stairs and not be out of breath. I love that I can run around with my children and outrun them!

So it's time. Time to suck it up. Time to say no, even though nothing in me wants to continue. It's when the going gets tough that I show my true colours. I WILL not give up just because it's hard. At the end of the day, it's just chocolate. It's just sugary/salty rubbish that will leave me unsatisfied, with a horrible food hangover. Nothing can beat the feeling of satisfaction from exercising self-control and treating myself with respect. Nothing.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Confession Time

Today hasn't been going so well. After yesterday's saga of a Monday, I had high hopes that today would be better. I should have stayed in bed. Days like yesterday remind me of my emotional relationship with food and my reliance on it as a coping mechanism. All day I fought with myself not to eat a pile of chocolate and for the most part I won. Today presented me with new challenges.

Levi had a rough night, he's got a horrible cold and was awake for hours and very unsettled. (You can almost hear the excuses coming can't you?) So not feeling the greatest myself this morning I decided to keep myself and Levi home from work/kindy, spending the day recouping at home. After eating some healthy porridge for breakfast and dropping the girls at kindy, I came unstuck. All my drive and determination for my weigh in tomorrow dissolved, leaving in its wake the strong but pathetic desire for anything that wasn't in my meal plan. I replaced my ham, cheese and avocado toastie for lunch with a microwave chocolate cake in a mug. I followed this with 1/3 of a block of chocolate. Nutritious lunch? I think not. Do you think I stopped there? No. It was at this point that I becsme frustrated with myself, but in that mindset where I justified any future bad decisions by the fact that I'd already royally stuffed up my eating for the day. I continued into the afternoon, eating and eating. And here I am. Writing this blog. Feeling positively ill. Have I learnt my lesson? Perhaps for today.

You know what the awesome thing is though? I know that tomorrow is a new day. I know that my goals remain true. I know that I'm stronger than I think. And I know that I am determined and that my will is stronger than my emotions. I just have to exercise it.

Monday, June 18, 2012

Struggle Street

Oh man today has been tough. It started like any other. Then went downhill. Quickly. My daughter, whom I will refer to as Sweetpea, has a cough. This cough has kept her awake for a few nights now, leading to lack of sleep, and we have been treating with cough medicine. Note to self. Cough medicine makes Sweetpea go loopy! Anyway, all that to say that I would be having more success today if I just sat in the corner banging my head against the wall. Have been craving sugar/chocolate so badly today, which I know is just an emotional response but it's so hard to overcome. I succumbed and had some dark chocolate melts (cooking chocolate - did I mention I was desperate?!) but it did little to satiate my appetite for Cadbury. Due to the fact that the kids are in bed and that I would need to drag them all to the shop to buy chocolate, I ended up making some vitaweets with hummus. The craving for chocolate is gone :) Yes it would be nice to have some but my body isn't wreaking havoc on my mind like it was.

So healthy choices win again. And I feel better for it.


Sunday, June 17, 2012

Goal Setting Time

Weight Loss & Measurement Goals (by end of August)

1. Lose 5kg
I'm currently 3.8kg away from my initial goal of 66kg but I'm determined to get to 64kg as I believe this will be the ideal weight for me within my healthy weight range.

2. Lose 5cm from my hips
I'm finally starting to see some movement in my problem areas - hips and stomach. I want this 5cm GONE!

3. Move completely into size 12 clothing.
I'm currently wearing a couple of pairs of size 12 pants, jeans and tops but mainly still in size 14. I want to say goodbye to size 14!

Fitness Goals: 1 month

4 Swim 200m non-stop 
Begin swim training three days each week for 45 minutes

5. Complete the Dianella Track/Cutheringa Track run in 50 minutes.
Current PB is 58m45s. I can cut this time by doing the uphill run non-stop and faster and increasing my run speed around the bottom of the hill.

Fitness Goals: 2 months

6. Complete the 10km Townsville Airport Fun Run on 5th August

7. Swim 400m non-stop

Fitness Goals: 3 months

8. Swim 600m non-stop

9. Complete the SportsMed Triathlon Enticer (400m/12km/4km) on 15 September.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Erin the legend!

Wow! What a challenging session we had at Spartan tonight! Arms, back and core. My muscles are still quivering from the onslaught!

I train alongside this incredible woman, Erin, who challenges and encourages me so much. She's impossible to keep up with but I try! At 47 years old, she's the picture of health, fitness and vitality I will strive for as I get older. Shes got guns of steel and a heart of gold.

Back in the sixties!!!

I woke this morning a little nervous about my weekly Wednesday weigh in. I've been sitting between 70.5 and 72.5 for about a month due to holidays, visitors, eating heaps and drinking a little too much wine. BUT this week, I sucked it up, determined to get under 70kg. My nutrition still has a little way to go, but was definitely better than it has been and I nailed the exercise for the week. Trips up Mount Stuart, Castle Hill and Spartan have definitely been paying off!

And the results are in! I had a 500g loss and am under 70. Weighed in at 69.8kg! I'm so rapt!

Onwards and upwards!


Sunday, June 10, 2012

Lessons

Had a mammoth day training yesterday. Levi woke early so I decided to head up Castle Hill before going to Spartan. So glad I did! It was a beautiful morning! Levi snored the whole way up. Quickly raced home after to drop Levi off and get the girls breakfast before heading off to Spartan. Brad absolutely smashed us! I think my heart was about to explode out of my chest as I did the circuit, but it was so worth it! 1109 calories burnt for the day!


My big breakthrough for the day was heading down to the strand with the kids to meet some friends for a play and dinner. I knew we'd be getting fish n chips and for the first time I actually made the better choice, went in prepared and it paid off! I packed a salad from home, plenty of fruit for the kids and some crackers and hummus for myself. When it came time for dinner I just order grilled fish and wait for it, NO CHIPS! It was hard in that moment not to but as I was eating my salad and fish, it was so delicious, I felt fulfilled after my meal and the best thing is, no guilt!

I've been catching myself out on some excuses lately. The main one is justifying bad food choices by saying, "That's just real life, things come up". For example, having friends visiting and going out to dinner and eating food that's not good for me when I could easily eat at the same restaurant and make a healthy choice. Yes, it is 'real life' to go out for dinner, and even eat gelati for dessert, but moderation and being in control are crucial in these situations. Letting things blow out of control and just going nuts eating everything in sight is not doing myself any favours. Toby and I took the kids to Fasta Pasta the other night as I won a $50 voucher from a local radio station. The kids were rapt as they're favourite food is pasta. I'll admit that I was drooling at the thought of eating a delicious plate of pasta, and I had all intentions of ordering an entree size. We got there and I order a main size pasta (which was delicious I might add!), ate a heap of the free bread with butter that they keep bringing out, and absolutely gorged myself. The pleasure I felt in the moment of eating was quickly replaced by feeling so ill from overeating, and abusing my body. So many people say to me that it's okay to go out for dinner and enjoy it. I wholeheartedly agree. My problem however is the emotional attachment I have with food, to gorge myself beyond what my body needs or wants. This isn't okay. I WILL learn how to go out to dinner and eat just the right amount and enjoy every morsel and walk away feeling proud. These are all good lessons learned. The very next day after the pasta incident, was the day I chose grilled fish over deep fried fish and chips. I am a work in progress.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Before and After


Please excuse the undies shot, but this is what reality looks like and there's no going back! 


26.2kg gone forever!

Memories

This morning I was walking up Castle Hill, with Levi in the carrier on my back. I realised that I should have started a blog 5 months ago when I began this journey of becoming healthier, fitter and stronger for my kids to read when they're older, and to re-live the memories for myself. So today it starts. My blog.

A week after giving birth to Levi, I weighed myself. The number on the scales read 96.6kg. I wasn't surprised but I also knew that this needed to be the last time I read that number on the scales. Fast forward a few weeks and we have Boxing Day. The first day of my monumental decision to get my health back, and the health of my family.  I signed up the Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation (12wbt). I started exercising and burning 500 calories a day and eating 1700 calories a day (allowing for breastfeeding). The weight began to fall off, I made some fabulous new friends through the Townsville Crew of the 12wbt and pressed on. By the start of the official 1st Round of the 12wbt I had lost 10kg. This spurred me forward. The following 12 weeks resulted in me losing another 13kg by mid-May. Today my weightloss stands at 26.2kg in 5 months. I feel like I've got my life back.

Levi has been with me along this journey the past 5 months, in the pram whilst I walk and run, in the carrier on my jaunts up the Hill, early morning workouts with friends and 4am strolls when he just won't sleep.On my walk this morning, I was struck by how precious these mornings with him are, and how quickly he will grow and this season will be over.





I plan to live a long, healthy life with my husband and kids. No going back.